Chelsea Handler: New book, tour coming in March

Chelsea Handler's new book of humorous essays, Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang, will be published in March -- and Chelsea is hitting the road to promote it.

Handler's tour, sponsored by Belvedere Vodka (there's an appropriate match!), kicks off March 10 at Chicago's Rosemont Theater and will take the "Chelsea Lately" host to 21 cities, including Phoenix, San Francisco, Denver, and Boston. Tickets will go on sale beginning this Friday.

The book will also be available in an unabridged audio version, narrated by Handler herself.

No reviews yet, but here are a few excerpts provided by the publisher:

Being unpopular: "My parents couldn't have been more unreasonable when it came to fads or clothes that weren't purchased at a pharmacy."

Living with her boyfriend: "He's similar to a large toddler, the only difference being he doesn't cry when he wakes up."

Appreciating her brother: "He's a certified public accountant, and I have a real life."

Arm-wrestling a maid of honor: "It wasn't her strength that intimidated me. It was the starry way her eyes focused on me, like Mike Tyson getting ready to feed."

 DATE            CITY                 VENUE
 10-Mar-10       Chicago, IL          Rosemont Theatre
 11-Mar-10       Phoenix, AZ          Dodge Theatre
 12-Mar-10       San Fran, CA         Nob Hill Masonic Center
 13-Mar-10       Denver, CO           Wells Fargo Theatre
 19-Mar-10       Portland, OR         Keller Aud
 20-Mar-10       Seattle, WA          Paramount Theatre
 26-Mar-10       Miami, FL            The Fillmore
 27-Mar-10       Washington, DC       DAR
 28-Mar-10       Atlanta, GA          Fox Theatre
 2-Apr-10        Detroit, MI          Fox Theatre
 3-Apr-10        Minneapolis, MN      Northrop Aud
 9-Apr-10        Uncasville, CT       Mohegan Sun
 10-Apr-10       Boston, MA           Citi Wang Center
 11-Apr-10       Chicago, IL          Rosemont Theatre
  16-Apr-10       Austin, TX           Bass Concert Hall
 17-Apr-10       Philly, PA           Tower Theatre
 23-Apr-10       Houston, TX          Verizon Wireless Theater
 24-Apr-10       Dallas, TX           Nokia
 30-Apr-10       Los Angeles, CA      Gibson Amphitheatre
 1-May-10        Reno, NV             Reno Events Center
 7-May-10        Kansas City, KS      Starlight Theatre
 8-May-10        San Diego, CA        SD Civic Theater
 15-May-10       New York, NY         Radio City Music
 16-May-10       New York, NY         Radio City Music